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A Conspiracy Theorist Is Talking Shirt $21.68

UFOs Are A Psyop Shirt $21.68

A Conspiracy Theorist Is Talking Shirt $21.68

  1. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    My-my wife is Asian

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      She *was* Asian.
      At least you save money with a smaller casket.

  2. 1 month ago
    Anonymous
  3. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >asian
    >woman
    >tesla
    checked 3 boxes all at once, neat

  4. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    it was a hitjob

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >Chao
      It was an asian woman

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      This.
      She was an open member of the CCP and sat on the board of the Bank of China. She was on the executive team of the Chinese military manufacturer. She was the CEO of Taiwan's largest shipping company that had hundreds of billions of shipping orders with China. She was also the sister-in-law of Mitch McConnel. Her husband's company, IDG group, was blacklisted by the Pentagon for helping the Chinese military TWO DAYS before her death.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        How is that possible? Isn't Elaine Chao's family some wealthy Taiwanese shipping fortune? Or is their family one of those that fled to Taiwan with the KMT from the CCP and has gone full circle back to aiding the enemy?

        I'm Taiwanese myself and in Taiwan many "Taiwanese investors (in China)" are like this and considered very untrustworthy even among the Taiwanese because they are people who will sell out their own country (the US or Taiwan) to the CCP to make a quick buck. And nothing of value was lost.

        This has been demonstrated many, many times. You wait for the vehicle to fill with water enough to open a door, and swim out. The doors have mechanical latches that bypass the locks, so the state of the electronics does not matter. In many vehicles, the windows will still function while underwater for quite some time, copper is a much better conductor than dirty water and anything that isn't dependent on sensitive electronics (computers) can remain functional while submerged. So you can, you know, roll a window down. Probably couldn't in the Tesla, but you could still just open the fricking door when the water level was up to your throat.

        But on Top Gear the opposite was shown and you would have drowned if you waited long enough for the pressure to equalize...

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >Probably couldn't in the Tesla, but you could still just open the fricking door when the water level was up to your throat.
          Not fricking likely.

          Trusting the Brits over the Americans, how unfortunate.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        oh ok so where is the bad news?

      • 1 month ago
        yeah

        teslagays will make up entire conspiracy theories to defend their homosexual car. have a nice day, Black person.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >Elon shills at it again with their distilled copium

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >Her husband's company, IDG group, was blacklisted by the Pentagon for helping the Chinese military TWO DAYS before her death.
        Based if true. Thabk you US government for killing these duplicitous and dishonorable chink homosexuals. They should kill her husband for being a traitor too. America first. This news actually made my night.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >Thabk you US government for killing these duplicitous and dishonorable chink homosexuals.
          If the US ever resolved to fix itself it would be via coup.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Had to be and if so, good riddance.

      This.
      She was an open member of the CCP and sat on the board of the Bank of China. She was on the executive team of the Chinese military manufacturer. She was the CEO of Taiwan's largest shipping company that had hundreds of billions of shipping orders with China. She was also the sister-in-law of Mitch McConnel. Her husband's company, IDG group, was blacklisted by the Pentagon for helping the Chinese military TWO DAYS before her death.

      I read about her husband some months back and may have posted something to the effect of "kill them both to send a message to the CCP" while I was drunk.
      Maybe the glowies listen to us.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        now you need to do it with Israel

  5. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >trying to break the glass instead of immediately opening the door and swimming away
    I think you'll find that any cars' glass when underwater is impossible to break.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >truck gun
      Hrm, maybe it was a good idea all along
      Oh wait, I don't live anywhere near water, keep getting robbed truck gun guys

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      The differential pressure against the doors will make them impossible to open. The windows can be broken with simple tools if they're not made to be inescapable death traps in any scenario.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        This has been demonstrated many, many times. You wait for the vehicle to fill with water enough to open a door, and swim out. The doors have mechanical latches that bypass the locks, so the state of the electronics does not matter. In many vehicles, the windows will still function while underwater for quite some time, copper is a much better conductor than dirty water and anything that isn't dependent on sensitive electronics (computers) can remain functional while submerged. So you can, you know, roll a window down. Probably couldn't in the Tesla, but you could still just open the fricking door when the water level was up to your throat.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Oh yes, the fabled mechanical latch that tesla tells you will break if used once or twice in optimal conditions.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >Probably couldn't in the Tesla, but you could still just open the fricking door when the water level was up to your throat.
          Not fricking likely.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            [...]
            Trusting the Brits over the Americans, how unfortunate.

            So my understanding is that if you go into a body of water you first want to try to open the door/windows ASAP before the water pressure makes it impossible. Otherwise your only other option is to open the doors when the car reaches the bottom and the pressure delta has reached near 0. good luck if it's deep as then it's a death sentence. Pressure cannot ever be underestimated.

            Questions like how to find air to breathe in for as long as possible, difference between car filling with water and reaching the bottom, and other options like breaking the glass or prying the doors or escaping through the trunk were not explored.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            You don't have to wait until the car reaches the bottom, you just need to equalize the pressure by filling the car with water. Rolling down the windows to let more water in will speed this up dramatically.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            HOT GLUE

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Please don't do that, they're very expensive.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            This is wrong. Remember that water isn't static as the car is sinking. It's traveling over the body of the vehicle and creates high pressure regions over the body of the car. Remember too that water is denser than air and is non-compressible, so those high pressure regions are far more powerful than those you experience on the road, even at high speed. The fact is that if you are sinking, even if your vehicle is full of water, opening that door might be impossible simply because of the pressure delta created by the movement of water over the body of your car.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >fluid in motion has higher pressure than static fluid
            Bernoulli would like a word.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Hey, dipshit. Do you think pressure is higher or lower inside the car? Do you think high pressure regions are generated anywhere on the car body as it sinks? Do you think opening a door at highway speed is easier than opening it while standing still? Do you realize that you do not understand shit about fluid dynamics?

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >using a comedy show
            >for honest, factual information.
            remind me, how many shitheaps did they suck off because they're italian?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        If there's a pressure differential, you still breathing air homie

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          You think she's swimming out of a deep pond?

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >ostensibly an adult who isn't a quadruplegic stroke victim with brittle bone disease
            >you think she's swimming out of a pond
            I mean... yes? Why wouldn't that work? Does being an asian woman mean she's prone to shifting HERSELF into reverse instead of Drive as well? Actually don't answer that.

            >Tesla's touchscreen shifter claims its first victim
            I really wish those command-economy/Politburo types in the European Commission make physical controls for basic and emergency functions (shifter, parking brake, AC, doors, hazards, headlights etc.) mandatory. EuroNCAP has already started making noises about them, so I hope the EC follows.

            >i wish they'd make emergency controls mandatory
            Frick that I wish they wouldn't and would even stay completely quiet on the matter and everyone who Buys It Anyway™ fricking dies fully deserved horrible prolonged agonizing deaths for their own moronic hubris. We need to purge dumbfrick dipshit morons not preserve and breed more of them.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >The windows can be broken with simple tools
        Nope. Any multiple-glazed window (two or three glass panes with plastic film in-between) are nigh-impossible to break. You find those in most luxobarges (and Teslas, apparently) since they offer improved thermal and noise insulation.
        The only functional option is, like other anons have mentioned, to wait until the car is (mostly) flooded, hold your breath, open the door and swim out.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >opening the door
      >Tesla
      Tesla's have electronic door handles that commonly fail in accidents and floods. They also have mechanical backups but they're designed to be as counterintuitive as possible.
      Some Tesla's hide the backup door handle underneath the armrest, some require you to pry off a trim piece and tug on a hidden cable (the manual literally states this), and in the case of certain Model3's there is no backup.

      Tesla's touchscreen shifter claims its first victim

      She was driving a Model X which has a self-centering gear selector on the steering wheel column

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >which has a self-centering gear selector
        The Prius also has a great selector like that but they're not backing into a lake.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Yeah but the Prius shifter isn't hidden behind the steering wheel, or being used by a rich Asian female who probably can't even see over said steering wheel.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Oh well it's rich morons doing stupid things as usual. The pharaohs died of diabetes, the nobility lost their minds to mercury and lead, Chinese operatives die after fricking with the shadow government.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >She was driving a Model X which has a self-centering gear selector on the steering wheel column
        Depends on the model year

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >She was driving a Model X which has a self-centering gear selector on the steering wheel column

        isnt it in the tablet?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      You should try to open the door immediately before the water gets too high, otherwise you're probably fricked. Maybe people should carry one of those little hammer tools for breaking windows in their center console.

  6. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    What they didn't mention either is the car was sinking so slowly she called her frickin friend instead of 911 or, I don't know, opening the frickin door
    Definition of a frickin woman moment

  7. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    If she drove a BYD, she would have lived.

  8. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    your seat belt buckle makes a pretty good glass breaker in a pinch

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      so does a gun

  9. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >billionaire
    >dead

  10. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    ELON MAN BAD

  11. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >chao
    >reversed into pond

    • 1 month ago
      Greased Geese

      jej

  12. 1 month ago
    Anonymous
  13. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    anyone else think that maybe somehow elon hacked into her tesla and put it in reverse and possibly hacked it more to make sure doors wouldnt open before it all shorted out?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Elon? Or tesla workers? No.
      NSA/CIA spec-ops tier SIGINT? Definitely.

      Have to wonder what's been going through Mitch McConnell's head for the past week.

      >The windows can be broken with simple tools
      Nope. Any multiple-glazed window (two or three glass panes with plastic film in-between) are nigh-impossible to break. You find those in most luxobarges (and Teslas, apparently) since they offer improved thermal and noise insulation.
      The only functional option is, like other anons have mentioned, to wait until the car is (mostly) flooded, hold your breath, open the door and swim out.

      Well, no, you're supposed to open a window as you sink. There's plenty of time to do so.

      >Tesla's touchscreen shifter claims its first victim
      I really wish those command-economy/Politburo types in the European Commission make physical controls for basic and emergency functions (shifter, parking brake, AC, doors, hazards, headlights etc.) mandatory. EuroNCAP has already started making noises about them, so I hope the EC follows.

      My first thought was "that's what happens when your gear selector isn't a physical control" but I do believe she was assassinated.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >what's been going through Mitch McConnell's head for the past week.
        no idea but I hope next week its a bullet

  14. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Tesla's touchscreen shifter claims its first victim

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >Tesla's touchscreen shifter claims its first victim
      I really wish those command-economy/Politburo types in the European Commission make physical controls for basic and emergency functions (shifter, parking brake, AC, doors, hazards, headlights etc.) mandatory. EuroNCAP has already started making noises about them, so I hope the EC follows.

  15. 1 month ago
    Anonymous
  16. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Ive accidentally put my vehicle in the wrong gear, but I figure that out almost instantly when. feel it moving backwards instead of forward. Ive also turned on my windshield wipers and been confused for a second after a long day of driving a forklift. There's no way for the car to go in the pool simply cause you shifted wrong. There has to be other factors.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      women driver

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        My mother also selects the wrong gear pretty frequently but being white she hits the brake and then figures out why its not doing the right thing. You have to be asian to say oh frick I accidentally put it in reverse, ill just floor it into the pool instead of stopping and figuring this out.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >after a long day of driving a forklift
      It doesn't take much seat time in the forklift for me to start trying to shift with the turn signal stalk.

      >Several hours beforehand he contacted a friend asking to borrow their car because he believed the FBI tampered with his, the friend said no.

      Yeah if my friend asks to borrow the car for that reason, hes either right and they frick with me/my car for helping, or hes crazy and shouldn't be driving.

      >shouldn't be driving
      He definitely shouldn't have gotten into the car if he thought glowies had done something to it.

  17. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >billionaire
    >dies in the most comedic fashion imaginable
    wtf i love tessies now

  18. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >Family of Treachery Silent Assassin Suit-Only
    Good work 47, the money has been wired to your account. Go find an exit and we'll speak again soon.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >Agent 47
      Currently doing the Sniper Assassin challenge for the Cybertruck mission.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >Currently doing the Sniper Assassin challenge for the Cybertruck mission.
        Car bomb, EZPZ. Dismissed as battery fire.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      "Do you have glue?"

  19. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    It's surprisingly easy to hack a Tesla and make it drive into a pond if you need to get rid of a very important person. This assassination would've been a bit more difficult if she drove some older car.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Anon that kind of attack isn't Tesla exclusive or even new to begin with. Look up Michael Hastings' death.
      Michael Hastings was an American journalist who gained popularity by publishing articles discrediting various glowing government agencies. In 2013 his Merc C250 was seen travelling down the Hanwiener Park straight at top speed, with glowing brakes that had faded so bad they were throwing sparks. Eventually he hit a tree and was killed instantly, authorities wasted no time in declaring it an accident and cleaning up the mess.
      Several hours beforehand he contacted a friend asking to borrow their car because he believed the FBI tampered with his, the friend said no.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >Former U.S. National Coordinator for Security, Infrastructure Protection, and Counter-terrorism Richard A. Clarke said that what is known about the crash is "consistent with a car cyber attack." He was quoted as saying: "There is reason to believe that intelligence agencies for major powers—including the United States—know how to remotely seize control of a car. So if there were a cyber attack on [Hastings'] car — and I'm not saying there was, I think whoever did it would probably get away with it."
        Frick, even he was trying to cover his ass

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >There is reason to believe that intelligence agencies for major powers—including the United States—know how to remotely seize control of a car
          Glowies do this for a living. This is their life. They operate with nearly unlimited budget and power with access to the latest black budget technology and no oversight or accountability because "it's a matter of national security" and have the pretext to keep everything top secret.

          Anything you think they can do and are capable of doing, they are doing. They have backdoors through Intel and AMD CPUs. Musk is an asset used to roll DARPA projects out into the civilian world, you can bet Teslas are compromised despite their open source claims. A Tesla car is a glowie's wet dream considering all the cameras, sensors, and computerization they have. A manual transmission car you can mechanically pop into neutral at any time with a mechanical parking brake, ehh well not so much.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >know how to remotely seize control of a car
            CANBUS was not designed for security in mind and automakers consider the expense unnecessary. Exploits can remain useful for the lifetime of the vehicle series. If automakers gave a shit they'd consult the gambling/gaming industry and adopt their CANBUS encryption schema, as well as module security on the hardware level. This would be expensive too, and consumers don't notice it beyond the cost, kind of like safety.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >Several hours beforehand he contacted a friend asking to borrow their car because he believed the FBI tampered with his, the friend said no.

        Yeah if my friend asks to borrow the car for that reason, hes either right and they frick with me/my car for helping, or hes crazy and shouldn't be driving.

  20. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >U-UHHH UHHH ACHULLY THE WINDOWS ARE TOO STRONG!!!!!
    elon named the israelite, remember this whenever you see an article shitting on him or his companies

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      rofl, then he went on a week long apology tour with Ben shapiro to visit auschwitz. You can't make this up.

  21. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    population control at it's finest. frick billionaires.
    hopefully they keep buying these things and accidentally reversing them into bodies of water.

  22. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >asians
    >driving
    asian here

  23. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    yo that's one way to lower your carbon emission

  24. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >Due to a certain type of glass used on the Tesla, the glass is nearly impossible to smash underwater
    Anyone has more info on this? Is it unbreakable on both sides or would a Window Breaker work from the inside ?

  25. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    If I were on my Texas ranch, I would simply not accidentally reverse into my own pond. RIP to your billionaire sister-in-law but I'm different.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >everythings by-wire
      >accidentally drive in to a pond
      >doors and windows stop working
      really activates you're almonds

  26. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >he doesn't understand basic fluid dynamics

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