Bros I'm about to buy a Chevy Suburban as my first car. What are some tips for owning a car like this?

Bros I'm about to buy a Chevy Suburban as my first car. What are some tips for owning a car like this?

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  1. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Make sure you get waterproof seat covers for all the b***hes you'll pick up

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      this. tnis anon understands.
      be prepared to live like an absolute Boss..

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      also this. also get those seats reupholstered if they're ratty. that way you can christen them yourself. like busting a champagne bottle against a fresh ship. except it's love juices splashing against freshly restiched seats.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >What are some tips for owning a car like this?
      All I remember with old GMTs is that there is no such thing as having a full tank of gas. They drink fuel like it's going out of style.

      Old GMTs are latina b8, probably due to cartel culture.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Do you have any secret knowledge about how to conserve as much gas as possible in one of these things? Besides driving it like a grandma.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          You're driving a 20 year old 5000lb brick with an engine designed in '55.

          If you want MPG drive a smaller car.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Actually, shift manually and drive it with enthusiasm. The transmissions are geared super tall and they upshift too early, so much of the reason they get bad mpg and burn out the transmission is you end up pressing the gas harder and having the TCC unlocked and gears shifting too much which increas wear and decreases mpg. The 5.3 actually needs to rev

  2. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    get a toyota

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      kys

  3. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Deal with any rust ASAP so you can keep it alive forever

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I live in Florida so rust isnt a big deal. It's in really good shape too. Only problem is that I'm inexperienced in driving and can barely trust myself with a vehicle this big. But apparently they're easy to drive.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        you will get used to it. just drive safely and always stay aware of your vehicle size. you'll be fine.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Obviously focus on relaxing and driving safe. Visibility unironically better than modern safety boxes. If ya do screw up GMT800 has the power get ya out of the tight spot. Drove one in the city for a long time, 3 teenage girls couldn't crash it you will be fine.

        Once blocked in Little Village by school bus and parked car. Not a place to stop moving, float the trugg though. Slapped side mirrors in and left faint paint scrap down the side.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        i can't speak for the 2500s, but regular suburbans don't have the best brakes. it's not an issue, but they don't exactly stop on a dime at speed.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          gmt900 brakes fit on gmt800s

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Once you can lock up the wheels your brakes are powerful enough.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Just be aware of how big it is, dont attempt to do U-turns. When you parallel park, go forward, turn in, run over the curb and turn the other way to drop it. Also, get trunk organizers, otherwise your shit will roll all over the place when you're hooning. Once you get used to it, the size is fine

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Compared to the modern bro-dozer shit rolling off assembly lines, a Suburban is nothing size-wise nowadays, and the thinner pillars will lend to your ability to see when driving. It's on par dimension-wise to something like my Toyota T100. From what I've seen of dashcam videos, just assume everyone in the state is out to hit your car. Don't necessarily drive like a schizo, but keep your head on a swivel so it becomes natural. Them and Texas drivers spook the shit out of me. Oh and New York too since you're close enough. I'm in Idaho where everyone is crapflooding in, so I get a little sketched out when I see at least Texas plates because they cause some of the dumbest accidents I've seen.

        Also check that your oil's been changed or just do it anyway. You know, little things. Make sure your fluids are flushed (radiator/brake lines), be sure the electrics are in good order; if they've been aftermarket Black person-rigged get them straightened out or be sure they aren't going to start a fire. Having just done suspension work, check up on that too, and if it's a little squishy it's not an immediate issue unless the ride quality is garbage. Pop the wheels off and make sure the brakes have been serviced, rotors and I'm guessing probably drums. My FSM says you can run it to 1mm of friction material but just don't run it till the rotors are coming apart like some people. Also check your tread depth on the tires, see if you need new ones.

        Don't know what else to say really, we typically buy our cars new and keep them for 20-30+ years. My truck is turning 31 this year and the FJ Cruiser is 3 years short of 20 with new shocks and sway links yesterday that I did myself. I've heard aftermarket parts are kinda shit quality lately too, so invest in brands you can still trust or try to get OEM. You may have to learn some wrenching skills because I've come to learn, especially lately, that the only who gives a shit about your car's life and longevity is (You).

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Also it's again...

          I have a theory about modern body thickness and insulation in relation to car horns. 90s/2000s car horns can't cope with it and 60s/70s horns can barely do so. I think they can't hear shit, especially when coupled with shitty rap music, so if you want to sink a little extra money in buy something stupid like some Hella Supertones. They're like rally horns and yes, they're ridiculous juxtaposed to that vehicle. I run them on my 2004 Corolla and usually get a middle finger when I have to use it. Can't ignore me now, frickers. Saved me from getting plastered by a box truck in Seattle on the 405 freeway once; we wound up going from the same center lane to opposite sides.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Your theory is wrong and the sound of those is shitty and high pitched. My 2000 European sedan is one of the loudest on the road and it's just a midsize. Maybe your weaboo trash can't cope.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >Toyota T100
          No, it's actually bigger than a Tundra

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >1993 T100 length 209.1" width 75.2"
            >2000 Suburban length 219.3" width 78.8"

            Okay, it's almost a foot longer and 3-4" wider. Mine's at stock ride height and I still cant see over the beltlines of some of the garbage I see in traffic now. I just made a garbage estimate because it still seems pretty long with an 8ft bed. Another thing you'll appreciate btw is being able to get into your engine bay. Some of the trucks I've seen I swear those "people" need a step ladder to get in there, assuming they even do it themselves.

  4. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Tips:
    1. Enjoy
    2. Panic
    3. Cope

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Tips:
      1. Enjoy
      2. Win
      3. Keep winning, Son
      *ftfy

  5. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    why not get a fricking tahoe instead? be honest, you don't need a fricking bus

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      GMT800s are hard to find unmolested here, and the Suburban gets almost identical mpg to the Tahoe

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >you don't need
      It ain't a Bill of Needs, commie scum..

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >muh needs
      tahoes are based, but the rear windows not rolling all the way down has always annoyed the shit out of me

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      The tahoe is a moron's car. A real man, or real woman, I won't judge, will always pick the burb or XL over the 'hoe or yukon.

  6. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Look into having it lifted.
    Will it be a diesel? In that case look into having it repro'd to roll coal.
    After you have done both, enjoy trolling cyclists who clog up roads.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >having it lifted.
      shut the frick up moron.
      go suck your backwood boyfriends bbc, idiot.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Are you an NPC or a woman?
        If you're content with the factory ride height/ ride quality/ suspension travel then you have accepted a compromise the manufacturer settled on after focus groups and corporate bean counters settled on an average based on all potential customers.
        Congrats on being a peon

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >I know more than the engineers who designed it!
          >lifting improves ride quality!
          el oh el, el em a oh even

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            So you're a woman, got it.

  7. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    It's gonna need every joint in the front end and leak oil from every orifice (especially the valve covers, oil pressure sensor, and rear main seal). Do the spark plugs and wires too, they need those all the time. Might also need the knock sensors under the intake manifold if the TSB to build an RTV dam around them hasn't been done

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I'd be more worried about that 4L60E.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Me too

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        It's what killed my $1000 Silverado C/K1500 that I still sold for $1000 afterwards.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        just don't beat the piss out of it and they're fine

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          The average GMT800 is pushing 300k miles. Even if that troony was religiously maintained from the factory that troony is still approaching the end of it's life. Especially one in a 6000lb Suburban. Like the other guy said it could last another 200k miles or it could die next week. But generally when buying a GMT800 it's a good idea to add $2-3k onto your purchase cost for a troony rebuild.

  8. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    lwb is a pain in parking lots and drive thrus, leather will tear, cloth will just sort of deflate as the foam deteriorates. radios are poorly grounded and will cause interference humming, just get a decent head unit. spare tire winches just inexplicably stop working, keep bolt cutters in your spare kit. center console lid buttons break, ac actuators break, both easy fixes. center high mount will stop cruise control from working, rpo ZW7 has $300 a piece nivomat shocks, putting z71 springs in is not difficult. 4l60e is at its limits, make sure its had a solid service record, if you care about having a g80 make sure it works. almost any of these still on the road have had the gauge cluster repaired so i wouldnt worry about it. LT tires are a must

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >lwb is a pain in parking lots and drive thrus,
      Skill issue, they are perfectly driveable even in Europe. 30 cm wheelbase and 50 cm overall difference is nothing btw.
      >spare tire winches just inexplicably stop working, keep bolt cutters in your spare kit
      Or replace it with Dorman version which doesn't for like $50
      >if you care about having a g80 make sure it works
      Until it grenades itself taking the entire diff assembly with it.
      >4l60e is at its limits, make sure its had a solid service record
      I'd recommend finding a cluster with the temp gauge and/or installing an external ATF cooler in addition to that.

  9. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    gas will run ya $10,000 a year.

  10. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Remember STD is real - get HPV vax and condom, these things make pussy drip.
    Long term HPV causes some really sad types of cancer.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      HPV vaccine doesn't actually prevent anything, but it also has side effects. I prefer that my cum drips out of women instead of condoms

  11. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I wish we had IDs so the samegayging incel attributting pussy magnetic properties to this thing would have to reset his router to not be so obvious

  12. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    The gmt800 suburban is surprisingly easy to drive. It has a better turning radius than a camry and drives way smaller than it is. Is it a 2500 like you have pictured here? The 2500 is breasts, the 4l80e shifts awesome, the hydroboost brakes, 6.0 and rear leafs are a great combo. The 1500s are nice too but the 4l60e can last another 200k miles or 20 miles. They also have shitty brakes but nothing dangerous. The suburban is the best vehicle, longest running name plate. Anyone who doesn't like suburbans is crazy, they really do everything well. Yeah, its 25 years old so its going to leak and the front end always needs to be rebuilt. Parts are CHEAP and they are easy to work on. Great choice

  13. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    They drive like ass and have less usable space than a minivan.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >t. drives a cuckvan

  14. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Is that your mom's car?

  15. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Get a GMT400 suburban and dont live with regerts

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >GMT400
      What if I enjoy living with regerts?

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Then you should get it permanently tattooed in large letters on your arm

  16. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Chevy bubbas unite

  17. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Recently inherited this. So far I've done the fluids and filters, wheel bearings, plugs wires and valve cover gaskets and a few other small repairs. Can't get the PRNDL to light up and the ABS and parking brake lights stay on all the time. Otherwise it's pretty good I guess. I need to paint the hood and replace some bushings and linkages in the suspension but it runs down the hwy very comfortably and it's huge which is different than what I'm used to.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Replace the neutral safety switch

  18. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Bros I'm about to buy a Chevy Suburban as my first car.
    Why?
    Large vehicles like the Suburban are a complete pain in the ass to drive. Are you planning to drive around 5+ people on the regular? Or haul lots of things that need to be protected from the weather? Those are the only two use cases for this vehicle class that makes sense. If you're just going to use it like most people do, ie, driving yourself and the bag of takeout you just picked up 0.5 miles away, then buy a normal sized vehicle instead of a bus

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Same reason why someone would want a truck. A suburban is just a silverado with a covered bed.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      It is a normal sized vehicle, it's called full size
      Why do you want to drive half or 3/4 sized car? Aren't they called "scale models", btw?

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I drive an older long bed single cab pickup as a daily, yet I rarely use the bed. Why? I like the truck and I want to drive it. Simple as.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Just say you can't drive, anon. I drive this thing everywhere, I got space for days, it'll tow a house, it's comfy and goes anywhere it wants to, town or out innawoods.

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