>end of the day
>your car keys are missing
>you look over and see this
what do you do?
 It's All Fucked Shirt $22.14 |
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>end of the day. >your car keys are missing. >you look over and see this
>end of the day
>your car keys are missing
>you look over and see this
what do you do?
It's All Fucked Shirt $22.14 |
|
It's All Fucked Shirt $22.14 |
Punch a hole in the wall.
I hate Chad so much
commit an antisemitism.
Is that actor a israelite?
If so, I'm with this guy. I would also commit an antisemitism.
Polish-Irish
report an incident of theft to management and the police
Frick Pam in revenge
laugh along with the joke then prank him back by dumping hot sauce in his lunch. then we'd laugh about that together while we think of ways to bully the autistic freak that DA likes to identify with because they were bullied in school.
>he says, fantasising about his friendship with a fictional character
Yooo fr Jim where be the keys for my whip my guy?
okay then he tells you where he hid them but in the process he loses them by accident, then what can you do?
Why does Jim think he's better than everyone else when he's working the same job? I have a few coworkers like this as well. It's like they don't like looking in the mirror and coming to terms they are a loser like us.
He comes from wealth
>Why does Jim think he's better than everyone else when he's working the same job?
He relishes in being a slacker and knows he's underachieving sticking around at his "first adult job," believing he has potential outside of that environment, which he later fulfills. Everyone else clearly belongs exactly where they are.
>Everyone else clearly belongs exactly where they are.
Dwight is already rich though.
>NTA
He has an ambition to not only conquer the rural market, but also the corporate as well. This is why he strives so hard at his office job. Autismos don't count
>Dwight is already rich though.
Yeah, for their own reasons neither really need the job, but that makes them comedic foils. Jim knows this and doesn't take the job seriously, Dwight found that he was also good at his first adult job too but is competitive and takes it very seriously. Though he is absolutely unsuitable to advance to a corporate environment because they make him completely ridiculous.
Media really built that up. What helped is that the slackers often achieve success in spite of themselves or with just a sudden burst of real effort. It makes laziness seem attractive to those who think enough of their intelligence because they think things will just work out for them whenever they need it to.
>Though he is absolutely unsuitable to advance to a corporate environment because they make him completely ridiculous.
You have to be a quite a yes man to make it in an office setting. Look at interviews of Top CEOS, to go on a show and say all these simp and cuck things, it takes a certain level of betaness. Dwight is right leaning, and Hollywood doenst like that, so they made him the "loser" and Jim the Man, but in reality, Dwight is the winner.
>neither really need the job
Jim needs the job. what are you talking about? lol. Dwight didnt, hes just some rural gay who wanted to be in the city.
>Jim knows this and doesn't take the job seriously
Jim is like your reddit crowd loser /antiwork guy which is why he is the main character that most people relate to.
>because they make him completely ridiculous.
because he has testosterone and doesnt just bow down to random shit.
It was really fricking cool in the 90s and 00s to be a slacker. Shame. Many people were seduced by that ideal and never lived to their full potential
It's worse now Lmfao. Hence why Democrat talking points are loved by Americans. Everyone is poor now so they say things like "tax the rich" and all the normies cheer lol
your job doesnt define how good of a person you are, if we both were walmart clerks but i had a hot gf, traveled the world on low money, played in a touring band, wrote a book, and knew tons of things than yeah id be better than someone with same job but no life achievements
Fair enough. But what Jim do with his spare time other than come up with ways to bully his coworker. At least Dwight own a successful farm.
I'm the production manager at my company so I would fire him on the spot for stealing. If he refused to leave, security would escort him out.
Good job moron you fired your second best salesman
I would just reassign his accounts to Dwight and probably increase sales in the process.
You're supposed to be Dwight in this scenario dumbass. You cant fire anyone. So what would you do if you were Dwight? I would just laugh it off cause it's clear jim is obviously some working class person and he clearly doesn't meet many girls if he is so committed to the office roastie who is fricking some blue collar loser in the warehouse.
People are more replaceable than ever since immigrants have flooded in illegally.
It's in the employee handbook that stealing is not tolerated. I would make a strong example out of him. The next day I would have a meeting with all of the employees to let them know that no one is above the company policies. I've fired people before for a lot less so my employees will know I'm serious when I say that stealing will not be tolerated.
that’s a nice HR solution, but a real manager would inspire him and get him to cut the pranking bullshit. Which this is part of, he wasn’t gonna keep the car keys
>Why are there nails in all my tires?
Well, he should have been smart enough not to steal then.
>makes some sales which translates to a small percentage of profits for the entire company
vs
>steals my car which directly cost me a few thousand, at least
Yeah, I'm thinking he's fired.
>Severance not required.
U sound gay af my homie, i bet you have a bald spot and a goatee
>what do you do?
Go nuclear on him with your retaliation prank. Let it be known that office pranks stay in the office and that anything involving personal property like your vehicle will not be tolerated.
this
you have to overreact bigtime to get back
take his fricking shoes, or have someone call him to say that they're taking his house or some shit
>you have to overreact bigtime
Yup. I was the prankster at my work. Simple stuff really. Tape over the mouse eye, flip computer screens, zip ties around the work vehicle drive shaft, etc etc.. Decided to prank a quieter co-worker with an old classic. I changed his computer wall paper with some half naked guy on a sports car. Always good for some laughs. Welp... he ended up fricking with my personal car by putting on novelty magnetic plate that read "cowboy butts drive me nuts" that luckily I caught but not after driving around on a busy street for awhile and he took my picture saying he was going to make me a grinder profile. Not sure if he ever did but I absolutely saw that he did not want to play reindeer games so I left him alone from then on out.
I’ve never watched The Office UK or US. I watched some clips just because people won’t shut up about it. This guy “pranks” his autist coworker, in what normal people would call bullying. That’s the joke? He’s an butthole to some loser every single day at work and that’s hilarious because the loser is cringe?
I really don’t get it. It’s not even “so mean it’s funny”, it’s just some extremely annoying butthole. And those highlight reels that are supposed to be cringe like a guy spilling sauce and Michael Scott lying about college credits? Where’s the funny? It’s not even slapstick.
There's a Saudi Arabia version
most people don't relate to the loser
Same. I never related to my coworkers and they could tell lol. They always resented me for it lol.
I remember working shitty jobs as an early 20s person meant for students and it was moronic seeing grown ups there. Now every shitty job is mostly adults. There are so many fricking poor people and the only way to enjoy your shitty office job is to be rich already so you go into the office and mog everyone, even the managers and supervisors.
Ok? How does that make it funny?
I do, gives me an odd feeling of satisfaction to see a day in life of a fellow frick-up on screen.
They should because it’s who they are.
Exactly, which is why everyone relates to jim, who is a beta loser working class.
I related to the female Aziz Ansari looking b***h.
you're right about everything except from when kevin spills sauce
that's hilarious
it's funny because it's a cold open that has absolutely nothing to do with the rest of the episode
Jim is an aloof everyman who does his job but doesn't invest himself in being a paper salesman whereas Dwight is a self-important sycophant who gargles company balls. Dwight is also peevish and flexes his authority whenever he gets any while Jim is portrayed as modest but serious in leadership roles.
That's why it works and doesn't come off as bullying.
>Dwight is a self-important sycophant who gargles company balls. Dwight is also peevish and flexes his authority whenever he gets any while Jim is portrayed as modest but serious in leadership roles.
This is what they want you to think. It was Dwight that saved jim from the warehouse guy with pepper spray. It was Dwight that owned jim in a snowball fight. It was Dwight that fricked random girls and didn't call them back. It was Dwight that owned lots of land. Some dude did a very detailed analysis of how jim was the alpha male all a long and jim was just a beta who simped for a girl at work who fricks low class dudes.
>This is what they want you to think.
Because it's literally the plot of the show and sitcom characters aren't complex. Dwight has redeeming qualities but the reason the dynamic between he and Jim doesn't come off as bullying is that Jim isn't malicious and Dwight acts like a pompous douchebag.
I don't think Jim is a sex symbol, anon. He's the everyman character and he's written to be likeable. Simple as.
>it's literally the plot of the show
Read between the lines.
It's a sitcom, anon. It's not a Faulkner novel.
I watched a two hour analysis on why Dwight was the alpha. You want the link?
No. I don't need a 2 hour clickbait video to understand a sitcom character, lol.
It's not clickbait. The guy I was gonna show u is banned from YouTube. I'm based like that.
Cool story, bro. I'm busy watching sports because I'm an alpha though. Maybe next time.
>He's the everyman character and he's written to be likeable
So beta and working class lol.i prefer Dwight.
>I prefer Dwight
He's more interesting but Jim grounds the show. Classic straight man dynamic.
Jim grounds the show cause he relatable to the average male and female? Yeah. He was relatable to me too. But then now he isn't after I ascended. Perhaps one day you will too.
>taking a conversation about sitcom characters this seriously
Lol, you havent "ascended," anon.
I have ascended because I have gone beyond the majority of men. So I can relate better to high status things. If you're an average male, you will relate to him. Even in middle school I didn't really relate to jim because of how he was such a simp to Pam. But older now, I realize Dwight is the one with land and capital while jim is just some office cuck. Also the show is written by "them" so it makes sense to show Dwight in a bad light
>sperg
Sorry, don't feel like reading the thoughts of a delusional autist who projects himself into sitcom characters.
You have normi thinking. Why do you think girls love the jim character. Cause he was a beta with onitis.
only non-autistic person ITT
So are you a zoomie or alphie?
My mom and brother love The Office so I'm very familiar with the jokes and storylines. Everyone on the show is an unfunny butthole. I don't think I've hated a fictional character more than I hate Michael Scott. I haven't laughed once at a joke he's made and how sentimental the show gets over him later on is embarrassing.
>I stand there in stone cold steely silence
>"A-anon?"
>He's unnerved by my demeanor, so much that when I step forward he jumps back a little bit, a beta move Pam clocks in disappointment
>"You know, Jim," I begin with a cool sigh, cracking my neck, "I've seen a lot of your boyish pranks over the years. The hitting on an engaged woman. Going out of your way to make everyone else's job just a little bit harder for your own amusement. But at the end of the day, you're in same place you always were. You haven't advanced in your career or your life. Your pranks are all forgotten by the end of the day. And that's what you'll be. Let me tell you something the others won't tell you because they fear your reprisal: This won't last forever. Your looks will fade, your jokes will run out of steam, and you'll end up bitter and alone, the only joy in your miserable existence being jerking off to the fleeting joy of the memories of your supposed victories, using your own tears as lubricant."
>"I was just-"
>"Your time of talking is over, Jimmy boy. Now you listen. I'm not Dwight. You hit me, I hit you back. Harder. And if you annoy me or inconvenience me, even delay me in my hard work (ever wonder why I'm advancing and you're not?), I'll make your life a living nightmare. I won't do it in the office. I'm smart, unlike you. But every wind that breaks, every passing shadow, you'll perceive in fear, knowing I am waiting, and one day, you won't know the hour, I will spring out to make your life a living nightmare, and the hell I send you to will seem like Heaven. You're nothing, J. You're nobody."
>*By now he's a blubbering wreck, his tears twin rivers to the lake of his pissed pants. He runs away and we can see he also shat himself from fear*
>*I also see a puddle under Pam, of veganal fluid. I caress the side of her cheek, softly, and she closes her eyes, leaning into my finger*
>"You don't have to take this Pam. You're better."
>I leave her with just a taste and go back to work
>*I also see a puddle under Pam, of veganal fluid. I caress the side of her cheek, softly, and she closes her eyes, leaning into my finger*
I meant the face cheek.
>>I leave her with just a taste of ball sweat and unwashed doritos licking finger grease essence and waddle off back to stock the shelves at Walmart
i kneel
Frick Pam as a joke
Rape Pam
GOOOOOOD MOOOORNING SAAAAAR
DO NOT REDEEEEEM
punch him on his giant clown nose
There this co worker who "messes" with people and he thinks hes being playful and funny but its really fricking annoying. One day i told him straight up "I don't play like that, just letting you know" and he starred at kind of looked sad and just walked away. He hasn't talked to me since
>pull out second pair of car keys and leave
Simple as
>pair of car keys
is this how an ESL thinks?
>pair of car keys
Well you cut off the first half of the sentence, moron. "Second pair of car keys" as in an ADDITIONAL set of keys, a spare, or, you know, a SECOND in a PAIR of keys.
Idiot.
>Second pair of car keys
Still doesn't make sense, moron. I'll leave it to your language teacher to tell you why.
>probably re-read the shit he wrote 8 times so he could have an epic own online
not him but stop being a redditor
>not him
Suuuuuure
>but stop being a redditor
Make me
>what do you do?
You have to go nuclear. In a war of attrition Jim wins so you blow it up by spilling boiling hot coffee on him or you threaten to tell that guy in the warehouse he's trying to frick his fiancee.
Stupid. In reality Dwight is like me. No amount of co workers trying to bother me would work cause he owns lots of properties and he is clearly rich already. Dwight owns like many farms and stuff. He is probably the richest person in the office.
But Jim's pranks do work as Dwight is continuously having the wind taken out of his sails. Also, it's sad enough to self-identify with a sitcom character...but Dwight? Lol.
But he is not though. Dwight took his job seriously. Owns land. Fricks random girls through our the show and the show has him saying some pretty alpha things to girls. Not once did jim have an alpha moment in the show.
>Dwight is an alpha
Lol, no anon. He's an autist who accidentally enters into sigma territory due to his lack of self-awareness.
someone still using the incel forum theories from 2019 is not going to outpace dwight in any aspect of life. he was a full on success.
>HE'S AN ALPHA THO!
No, moron. Again, he lacks self-awareness which leads to him accidentally being a sigma figure at times. He has redeeming qualities because The Office (US) doesn't trouble it's audience with negative characterization any more than it has to. The most traumatic thing in the series is Stanley being insubordinate to Michael in that one episode.
wrong.
>autist can't even dissect the character traits out of stock characters in the simplified and contained social dynamic of a sitcom
You're NGMI.
Michael was abusing Stanley because of the color of his skin, it was subconscious of course but Stanley was still right for standing up for himself.
Also, something autists have trouble learning is that you have to have outlets for social conflict (this is true throughout your life and if you don't figure out how to do it in the workplace you're in for a shitty time). Sometimes you have to blow a relationship up in order to rebuild it from a place of mutual respect. Autists tend toward conflict avoidance which is very unhealthy and leads to continuous resentment and a toxic environment.
thats interesting. but what i'd say you have trouble learning is that nothing is ever going to get resolved. maybe that just comes with age. but eventually many see that there's just zero point engaging in drama nonsense.
>what i'd say you have trouble learning is that nothing is ever going to get resolved
The fact you think interpersonal relationships are things that can be construed into black/white resolutions demonstrates autism. Interpersonal relationships are ongoing and if you wallow in resentment because someone doesn't respect you that's the through line you're going to deal with it you don't take the opportunity to engage in confrontation. People don't automatically respect one another, it's just not how it works, and sometimes you have to engage in conflict.
Autists fail to learn this for various reasons and end up being bullied and resentful. The axiom is that you're owed respect but the social reality is you have to earn it and do things to maintain it.
>sometimes you have to engage in conflict.
Thing is, Dwight is the highest status person in the office. Richer than even Michael probably.
See
. Dwight has almost no social capital (the only person below him is Toby).
Dwight fricks random attractive girls through out show including Angela while jim simped hard for multiple seasons. Lol.
>Angela
You mean the frigid evangelical Christian broad who treats her cats like children because she has no eggs? Lol.
Jim doesn't even win pam over on his own.
There are multiple points where he drops her and potentially gets his manhood back, only for someone to swoop in and tell him to stay in his lane and only ever pursue the one girl who clearly is using him as a backup option.
Worst tv couple that larps as a "good relationship".
Are there any other examples of shows where a guy pursues one chick that pathetically but it's portrayed as a noble and good thing?
>Are there any other examples of shows where a guy pursues one chick that pathetically but it's portrayed as a noble and good thing?
Almost every movie and show is like this. Californification is like one of the only shows that shows how to properly bang girls and not be a loser simp.
>Are there any other examples of shows where a guy pursues one chick that pathetically
People, screen writers, authors, directors and everyone involved in film create works that they themselves live and relate to. A legit player would create a write that is a legit player. A normie screen writer, producer or whatever, would create a characte that needs to chase a girl and simp and be a beta to. 90% of men are betamales. This includes, ceos, directors, producters, and people from all jobs so therefore, it makes sense most movies and tv shows also has betamale characters. It takes one to know one, and that is why Californication is a pretty good example of a show that has people working on it that live a non beta life. You cant create a character that you yourself cannot relate to. Sure you can make a fantasy character, but there are things related to girls that you need experience to write about and 90% of men do not have this experience.
>Are there any other examples of shows where a guy pursues one chick that pathetically
People on that show didnt go "lets create a beta characte chasing a girl pathetically." They just creat a character that they themselves live a life similar to. Many loser males do meet their wives through work lol.
Very true, where’d you learn this?
Middle school level life experience + adult rationalization.
You forgot gay man’s intuition
You only get that if you're molested as a child. Sorry that happened to you.
Normies are the ones that are passive aggressive. Every job I worked at was like this. It was always clear we don't come from the same back ground co workers always didn't like it. I never cared and their seething made it more fun. However this applies to Dwight too. It was clear he was the richest person there. Probably richer than jan, very likely.
>he's better than all of them anyway because of this one thing I mark as more important
Your autistic resentment is showing.
I am pretending to be Dwight. So if I'm dwight, I'm already rich while jim is a little boy working his first job.
Depends who he's fricking at the time rape them if he's single I rape him
i would start breaking into jims house and putting lipstick on his collars, womens perfume on his clothes, panties in his car. soon enough he'd find himself passing out early and waking up with prostitutes, with a whole lot of alcohol in his bloodstream. he can't stop at this point or the withdrawal will kill him. he's drinking at work. prostitutes are showing up at the office to ask for their payment. pam would find herself with a superior 'male friend' to comfort her while jim becomes increasingly insane. jim seems to show up wherever the scranton strangler has been striking now. there's methamphetamine in his system. poorly cleaned off remnants of blood on his clothing. uh oh. pam is pregnant. its mine.
>pam would find herself with a superior 'male friend' to comfort her
The backup male is usually on par or slightly lower than her current male.
Usually an aspiring beta, waiting for the right opportunity where his superior shows weakness.
tell me more about the studies of the university of moronic homosexuals. perhaps something about the jawbone?
Don't be upset at me, the nature of women is bound to cause anger.
such a berry picker post. you'll never be an alpha hunter like myself.
Probably not no as I enjoy sedating myself while consuming media.
i have already left the state and changed my identity. pams head has been found in jims backyard. i've just been hired. the company? the parks department of pawnee. something very bad is about to happen to the boyfriends of aubrey plaza and rashida jones.
Okay we all agree rape is the answer. But who?
>Pull out my glock 1911 and go full las vegas shooter on the whole office for not gifting me a tradwife
>After the bloodbath I calmly announce "I am Schrute" before blowing my brains out on top of Pam's lifeless body.
>Bully your autistic classmate/coworker and you’ll get the girl and everyone will love you
Nice messages these sitcoms sent out.
No,it was simp for an engaged to a blue collar loser office roastie for multiple seasons.
Jim wouldn't steal my keys. We'd get along.
He's still the most boring character but I guess that's the point
This is when you block off and seal all the exits after disabling the smoke alarms and fire sprinklers. Then you pour gasoline all over Jims desk and handcuff him to the desk as you drop a match and run away giggling about turnips or radishes or whatever weird shit you grow on your family farm.
I do nothing
his car mysteriously explodes for no reason when he starts it the next day
Baskin Roberts. OP is a Bateman homosexual.
I smile back and remove the Glock 19 from my desk. I gun down everyone else in the office. If he maintains this facial expression, I will spare him, If he does not, I will execute him.
I’m the guy who you’re arguing with in the baskin thread. Le office is for redditors.
Ask when he started first flirting with Pam was it during her engagement to Roy or after
ROBERTS ROBERTS BASKIN
I just recently found out that people unironically watch the Office beyond season 3 and I have questions.
I don’t watch it at all. I prefer the baskin show
Frick this show, it always interrupts my Seinfeld marathons on comedy central
Face it, most males relate to Jim more because they are working class brokies who needed to simp and bend over to get their wife/gf.
lose my shit in an autistic rage and start beating and stomping on his head like an angry gorilla while yelling GOD DAMNNNNIT, IM SO SICK OF YOURE SHIT JIM!!!! YOU THInK UR SO GREAT?!?!?!?! WELL GUESS WHAT, YOURE NOT!
Jim..youre poor..you dont own land...when you get to my age, you will be surrounded by even more blacks and browns..you will never be open to afford a home with such high inflation and immigration numbers..im just here for fun jim...
and then Jim has to see me every day after that lmfao
Honestly I'd just start punching holes in walls until I got them back.
I feel like this dynamic works way better in the original UK version with Tim and Gareth. Tim is way more of a pathetic loser than Jim and Gareth is way creepier and far more of an insufferable c**t than Dwight. Gareth seems like he could murder someone or rape a woman if he got the chance, and his whole personality revolves around being in the Territorial Army which is way more pathetic than Dwight who actually has something useful going on. It's impossible to feel bad for Gareth.
you're correct and this is largely to do with the strengths of fewer seasons, with fewer episodes, vs milking it for as long as possible. the UK office can afford to be more true to life and distinct.
what was the dog in dam busters called again, gareth?
I'd walk over to where he's at and just punch holes into a wall screaming.
>Please don't do this me today. I'm tired and have to go home and feed my dog.
One second, Jimbo, I gotta make a call.
>ff-f-funny j-j-joke j-j-j-Jim
quietly seethe for months
Be honest DA would you actually want to be Dwight's friend? Also this would make you a target of Jim's pranks by association.
Dwight and Mose seem like they have a good time without being party goer sex haver normies. Hell yeah.
Call Roy and describe when Jim kissed Pam in detail. Call Roy again when Jim is leaving the office and will be off the premises so Roy can exact vengeance.
report him
I cast revelio and accio to retrieve my keys then use the floo powder to get home.
this is the land of wolves now, Jim
*shoots Pam and then him*
Why did Zelensky get elected on a platform promising peace with Russia and the Russian people who live in Ukraine, promising to abide with the decades long Minsk agreements, then do a 180? Dragging a Christian nation into a meat grinder war with a nuclear superpower, shelling the Donbass and supporting acts of savage violence and reprisals against Russian men women and children living in Ukraine, ever since 2014?
Would America tolerate nuclear weapons on the Mexican border and Russian biolabs on the Canadian border? I think they had complaints about the Cuban missile crisis or something.
Daily reminder that Jim's jokes were playful and Dwight was clinically insane
>brought guns to work
>threatened coworkers with said weapons
>harassed all his coworkers
>Snake behavior
In season 9 when they made the season be the Dwight Show it put into light how much handwringing they put Dwight's actions through. Jim jokes, even the more over-the-top ones were still in the realm of reality and friendliness. Dwight jokes were something that would have gotten him fired a long time ago