My car battery is dead. A neighbor helped me with jumper cables. Then I let my car idle for 30 minutes and pressed the gas pedal a few times. But that was not enough charge. I couldn't start the car after I turned it off. I don't want to ask a neighbor again and I don't have a power jack nearby. What's the best thing to do? I'm looking at mini jump starters. Should I buy a motorcycle battery, a charger for it, and jumper cables? Can I use a powerbank for phones? Any suggestions? As cheap and small as possible.
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>As cheap and small as possible.
Bump start it, costs you nothing, just remember to park up a slope to make it easy on yourself.
no, I have to be able to do it alone, otherwise I would ask this other person to help me with his car
no, the battery is very difficult to replace on my car
>no, the battery is very difficult to replace on my car
Then I can guarantee you the alternator is way the frick harder and more expensive to replace. It's pretty easy math... $120 for a new battery and another $120 for installation vs a $120 battery plus another $700 for a alternator.
>installation
yeah like I'll just pick up the car and walk it to a workshop, holy shit you're all dumb as frick
CAA/AMA will come install batteries for you. I'm guessing your jeet ass was too cheap for that too.
>no, the battery is very difficult to replace on my car
A dead battery will cook an alternator fairly quickly. If you want to do that, go ahead and be a lazy, moronic homosexual.
Dead as in empty frickwit
moron, if your battery isn't charged in 30 minutes of idling, your battery is "empty" because it's fricked.
Your alternator will see the lack of battery voltage and output maximum power until the coils cook themselves, then you get to replace that or have no car, lazy homosexual.
Yeah a battery that goes uncharged is FRICKED DUDE
Yes. Discharging a battery below a certain voltage is likely to destroy it.
Even if that's the case I need a jump starter to even be able to drive to a workshop moron.
>still calling everyone else a moron after being too stupid to disconnect a simple terminal to prevent his battery from being destroyed and proceeding to be too stupid to understand that his battery has, in fact, been destroyed
You're confusing being uninformed and being stupid, moron. Anyway zero good advice here.
>gets informed
>copes and seethes and refuses the information
Yep, it's definitely stupidity.
>I'm too socially inept and brain damaged to go ask for a jump or get a jumper pack, so you're the moron!
Alternatively you can have the shop tow it in, but I wouldn't really know, because I would have replaced the battery by now instead of acting like a brainless thot screaming about a problem and doing literally nothing to rectify it.
I said I'll buy a jump starter frickwit. Replacing it is a very cumbersome process. Plus nobody even said discharging a battery damages it until late in the thread. Idiot.
>Replacing it is a very cumbersome process.
Who gives a frick? Your battery has failed and will damage the alternator if it is not replaced soon.
I give a frick dumbass. I'm not going to buy a bunch of tools and toil, I'll buy a $20 jump starter and drive to a workshop. After I've had it inspected because driving to the nearest inspection center is the only driving I'm legally allowed to do until it's been inspected.
>After I've had it inspected
It will fail the inspection with a damaged battery.
So?
So when you act like a moronic spoiled child to them, they are entirely capable of denying you the ability to drive it home and can have it impounded.
You haven't even said what car it is, so I assume you're just too fricking lazy to grab a pair of pliers and undo some bolts to make this car you're desperate to use have basic functionality.
Nah dumbass. I'm only allowed to drive to inspection. Replacing the battery has to be done by a workshop. For most faults you get a month to drive and get it fixed. Black personbrain.
>Replacing the battery has to be done by a workshop.
No, it doesn't.
>the battery is very difficult to replace on my car
nta but on some cars it is absolute dildos to even get at the battery because of all the shit installed above/around it
Frick you GM and your moronic battery placement.
>frick you gm!
>car is a ford focus
whar?
GM is king of moronic battery placement.
Hold my beer
So you have to pull a tire and a plastic wheel well cover just to see the battery? Plus is side mount so they'll come loose the moment you put the plastic cover back in place.
Yep.
Based if you're trying to replicate the crippling understeer of a Subaru or an Audi. Why do you think high performance cars run rear batteries?
It's already in the same spot just higher up.
Because high performance car owners don't want to put an engine crane in the boot like I do?
None of my batteries sit past the front bumper like that. They're all inline with the engine almost touching the strut tower.
That's because you have troonyverse turds lmao who gives a frick about battery placement when your engine is deliberately in front of the front wheels
Understeer is for cucks.
I can assure you my car does not understeer regardless of the battery placement.
Based spot if I'm honest, I have been considering relocating my battery to the same spot so I have room to build a filter box for my turbo and intake.
Yeah gotta love the battery getting submerged in water
Is your battery not sealed then?
Yeah dumbass
?feature=shared
>OH NO I HAVE TO REMOVE THE AIRBOX TO REPLACE THE BATTERY!>!!!!!
>WHATEVER SHALL I DO
So replace the air filter while you're at it lmao
do wrenchies really?
I don't have any tools frickwit.
>doesn't even have a $5 "just in case" socket set
>calls other people dumbass, moron and frickwit
wrenchlets, everyone
THAT is the "impossible" task you're terrified of?
Little zoomer boy is afraid of 10 minutes of work and a few wrenches, that's fricking funny.
You're still morons who don't know how to give advice amd then become defensive
>just push the car
>just park in a clope bro
>no mentioning that discharging damages the battery until 50 posts in
>muhu you're dumb and refuse to take good advice
Yeah you're dumb as frick
We give better advice than you are lol
If you're so good at giving advice you would given yourself all the advice you needed and fixed your problems already LMAOOOOOoOOoOoooooooooooooooooooo
I can walk out to my car, turn the key and it will start so who's the moron now?
You're a special breed of stupid if you think that only people that were here when the thread started can respond.
I was the one that said your battery was cooked and that it can damage your alternator, and I'm the one calling you a pussy-fingered zoomer moron for being afraid of needing to wash your hands after doing a few minutes worth of work.
Here's a snake I found while disassembling the engine of my daily. Go get some dollar store wrenches and change your battery, it'll be good for you to learn something for once.
I was giving you the benefit of the doubt that you had a totally fricked battery placement like
but jesus christ anon, that's piss easy. Have you never done any kind of work with your hands in your life?
>I don't have any tools
You don't need to be able to do a whole engine swap, but frick, anon. You cannot call yourself a man if you don't have at least a cheap ass ratchet and socket set for stuff like this.
>park up a slope
I already told you I can't start, so how exactly do you figure I'd drive up a slope
Sorry if I wasn't clear, I meant after you bumped it. Once you got it running, find a slope and park it there to make it easier the next time.
If you haven't got a convenient slope you might have to push it to one. Hazards on. Put it in neutral, handbrake off and push with your shoulder on the A-pillar, one hand on the wheel. Just be wary, the steering will be very heavy as you'll have no power steering. You don't need a long steep hill to bump, a short steep or a long gentle are just as good. Anything where the car will roll on its own will do.
Why can't ask your neighbor again? If it's about the jumpers, just ask a passer by to help you bump. No equipment needed, if you got a note in your wallet offer them that.
nah frick off, I'm buying a small jump starter like the pic, plenty of options
Fair enough, best of luck to you.
You’re gonna get stranded and you deserve it.
Walk to the store and buy a new fricking battery before you frick up your expensive alternator.
sounds like your alternator is dying or is dead already, you are buying the wrong product to fix the problem.
get the car started and check the voltage with the engine on, if its lower than 14 volts, your alternator is done. stop being a wrenchlet and learn, that way you can afford to drive a nicer car by fixing shit yourself to save money.
Have you considered purchasing yourself a battery charger?
>Then I let my car idle for 30 minutes and pressed the gas pedal a few times. But that was not enough charge. I couldn't start the car after I turned it off.
You've got more problems than a dead battery. That's plenty of charge to start a car. At the other anons said this is probably an alternator problem.
if it was the alternator the car wouldn't even run, it would just die in a few seconds after the jumpers were removed. his alternator is fine, as evidenced that the car can idle just fine for 30 minutes on it's own.
the battery is completely dead and will no longer hold a charge.
Dumbasses. The car started fine before I had it sitting unused for 5 months. It's just an empty battery.
>left the battery connected for 5 months without recharge
>calls others dumbasses
Lmao
Enjoy buying a new battery champ cause this puppy is COOKED
Get a new battery tard
Daily reminder that new batteries are a scam. Buy a smart charger and you’ll never have to buy a new car again
Yeah cool story bruz, test this theory out by buying a battery from the scrap yard and see how your magical smart charger frees up all the crystallization
Don’t tell me you fell for the junkyard battery decoy
Get any old battery and see how magic your smart charger is
That’s why they give a core refund when you return a decoy, so they can buy back the evidence
It will be very easy for you to see for yourself anon, either try it or stfu.
I have that’s how i know it works. New batteries is snake oil. Same with fuel stabilizer
No you haven't.
Go stick your smart charger on a thoroughly dead battery and report the results.
Yes I have. I made a thread about it a few months ago, you can search it in the archives if you’d like to learn about something for once in your fancy little life
What you took an old 50% health battery and brought it back to 70% health so now you think there's no such thing as a dead battery?
Go find a properly dead battery anon, they're not hard to come by because nobody wants them.
You mean decoy batteries? Why would I do that
you sure are a cheap lazy defensive homosexual OP. are you a teenager?
Nah I'm not lazy at all, you all are just dumb as frick and don't know how to give advice. Frick off moron.
>the man who needs advice complains that the advice is not good enough and calls the advisor a moron
If you're so smart why are you asking for the advice in the first place lmao
>nooo my battery is too hard to replace
>never once says what car it is because it's literally just a normal car and op is too fricking stupid to know how to swap a battery
Man OP is a moron
>can I use a powerbank for phones to charge my car battery
Holy frick
Not charge, jump start, dumbass. Mini jump starters can also be used to charge phones and look like big powerbanks.
just replace the fricking battery you moron
drive it to a fricking autozone or whatever the hell you have near you
ask the guy for their sockets
pull the b***h out, get a rebate
then throw the new one in
it's that fricking simple
unless you're a fricking paraplegic, it's super fricking easy
if you ARE a paraplegic, then the autozone kid will probably just do it for you
I'm only allowed to drive straight to inspection dumbass. I'm not even allowed to drive around to get the battery to charge. Hence why I just idled in the parking space.
I love how you think the boomers had it so easy back then when you don't have the balls, skills or tools to change a fricking car battery. What a fricking useless generation lol.
Take your battery out and take it to a battery store, ask if they can charge it for you. While you're there once it's charged, have them load test it. If it went flat and has been so for a while the plates probably sulfated and ruined the battery. Long term, get a battery tender type trickle charger. If you can't get a plug in one, get a solar one. Once a battery is charged, it doesn't take much to keep it that way. I use a 35W solar panel that is flush mounted to my truck canopy to keep my truck battery topped off. Haven't had a dead battery in years.
If you have a stick and your alternator isn't dead and you're on a hill, you can bump start it. Bump starting on a flat is only easy if you have a four pot and a good running start. If you do get it started, check the voltage at the battery, you want to see at least 13 volts and slowly rising, if you do go on a highway drive for at least an hour. If you see under 12 then your alternator may also be shot or you don't have enough voltage available to excite the alternator if you have an older rig. If the latter is the case, fish out a 12V battery and connect it to the exciter wire. You'll know when the alternator kicks in since you'll hear the load.
Op is ~14 years old
Small and cheap has the minor drawback of not working worth shit but you do you.
t.mechanic
If you ran it for 30 minutes and it still won't hold a charge overnight the battery is done. The water inside may have evaporated so check that first and replace with distilled water if necessary, but if it's full you just have a dead battery thats cells won't hold a charge anymore. Bring the old battery in for a core fee and buy a new one.